For those of you that know me online, you might be surprised by what I'm about to reveal (or if you've been reading this blog, you might already have a clue!) I have a real life. It's true. It has people in it.. and things. But it's the people that have me scratching my head right now. I have a BFF (don't we all?) that has been my BFF for over 20 years........ we met when I was 1 (are you buying that?) and we just instantly clicked. We could finish each others thoughts almost from the beginning. She's like family. But lately.. I get the impression my BFF could be a little envious of me. Crazy, right? I mean.. who would be envious of a middle age, out of work, woman who's taking classes and hates math? I think she is. *sigh*
Bff lost her job 6 months before I did. It will be a year for me in June....*sigh*. This might come as a shock to some of you, but did you know that I'm a very stubborn, independent person? It's true. Ask any of my family...or even some of my friends. I have a very hard time asking for help... of any sort. I would rather get frustrated to the point of crying and melting down than ask for help (remember algebra?) And that's how I've been all my life. This little character trait also plays itself out in how I spend money.. or don't spend it. I'm normally very good at assessing want over need and know when to buy something just to make my self feel good. I've also managed to save a nice little chunk of money. This little cushion gives me the comfort of not having to ask for help if things get bad. I think this is where the problem lies.
She'll make a comment about about how I don't have to worry because I have money, and how I don't know what she's feeling. Yet... it's *my* money!! I saved it! I would like to insert at this point that I am by no means rich...or well off. What I am is an economically smart person! If I have to crack open my 401k and live off of it when unemployment runs out, I'll manage for about 2 years. In comparison Bff has nothing. She always said she couldn't afraid to put into her account. I always said I couldn't afford not too....
What used to be phone calls every day have dwindled to *maybe* two times a week. The one hour (at least) per call? Now happens in maybe 15 minutes. It's sad to think that a situation we are both experiencing, that could bring us even closer together, is what is driving us apart.
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